Questions for Dads
To help facilitate our growth as husbands and fathers it helps to assess where we are now. Some questions posed by Gene Johnson and Mike Yorkey in Daddy’s Home can help.
1) What were your greatest concerns when you first learned that you were going to be a father?
2) In what ways are your style and actions as a father influenced by the personality and behavior of your own father or of another mentor?
3) What good role modeling are you offering to your children right now? What changes in role modeling would you like to achieve? (P.47)
Most of what we understand about our roles as husbands and fathers have likely come from our fathers. If our dads had good relationships with their wives and kids, then we probably received some healthy mentoring and role modeling. But if the key relationships of our dads were strained and broken, we may be carrying around some faulty views of our own about what our roles are.
Asking these basic questions can at least inform us as to how and why our perceptions have been shaped the way they are. We may then say, "Hey, my role models haven’t been that good. And if I am going to function as a husband and father the way my mentors did, I need to do some changing or my family could be in trouble."
The truth is, all of us, no matter how healthy or unhealthy our past may be, can learn and grow as a person, a Christian, a husband and a father. We can seek out other mentoring and educational opportunities for our growth and development. Two good places to look: healthy adult men in your church and good books recommended by a Christian counselor or minister.
May God bless us as we grow in the grace, mercy and ministry of God for the health of our families.