Time and Kids

Time and Kids

Sometimes I feel time speeding by like the train in this picture (Thanks to Karli Bonnie Photography).

Our two college (actually, grad school) kids were home for a couple of weeks over Christmas. Now they are back in school. We did some of the things we planned to do, but not all. Time.

We sometimes think of time as our enemy - it is constantly working against us or trying to escape us. Actually, time is our friend. It is here for us to enjoy with the people we love and the things we like to do (and, yes, even some of the things we have to do :).

One daughter, a senior, remains at home. How can we use our remaining time with her as a friend rather than an enemy?

- Celebrate the minutes and hours we do have together. Make the time memorable.

- Enjoy the things she enjoys with her. Right now that is basketball, and so far we have seen every game #11 has played.






- Still take advantage of the teachable moments. We can't just get misty during the final months. There is still some bending of the twig left, and as responsible parents, we can't let all those opportunities fly by.

- Create momories that will last. Two things I do here. One, take lots of pictures. Two, keep a diary of the kids' last year at home. I give them the diary when they go off to college. That is a big hit (and don't just write the fun or pleasant things; write the real things as they happen).

Just a few suggestions, but ideas that will hopeful help us to wisely redeem the time with our older kids.


Warren

(Note: I don't know how this post will look when it actually posts. I spent way too much time trying to get the paragraphs right, but I simply cannot get rid of the big gaps. This is when time becomes the enemy :).

Goals

Goals

This is what a basketball goal has always looked like to me. As an adult. As a teenager.


I remember watching friends compete to see who could reach the highest on the net, or even touch the rim. I was glad to be able to get my feet a few inches off the ground.

A few lucky guys could actually leap with a ball and dunk it. That goal always seemed so out of reach.


It would have been nice, when I was younger, to be able to jump and reach the rim. But really, it didn't matter then and it doesn't matter now. To be able to touch the goal was never a goal for me.

I think a goal must reach at least three criteria to be worthy of our efforts.

One, it must stretch us to be better people. A goal to clean up our speech, relate better to people, and read the Bible through in a year are such goals.

Two, it must require some serious effort. The work to achieve the goal is often as important and transforming as the goal itself.

Three, it must meet with God's approval. The things God approves are eternal in nature, so they really matter!

There is nothing wrong with being able to leap and touch a basketball rim. But, at 5' 10", I knew it wasn't a likely goal for me. It certainly isn't now.

But learning God's word, relating better to my wife and kids, and mentoring a fatherless ten-year old, now those goals stretch me, take serious effort, and pay eternal benefits. Those are three goals I'm working on this year.

How about you? What goals have you set that meet these three important criteria?

Warren Baldwin

Note: Thanks to Karli Photography for these great pictures.

See You At The Ballpark

SEE YOU AT THE BALLPARK

Be sure you know the condition of your flocks, give careful attention to your herds; for riches do not endure forever, and a crown is not secure for all generations. Proverbs 27:23–24

Many of the proverbs were written for family farmers and ranchers. This proverb addresses a small rancher whose livelihood is staked to the health of his cattle or sheep. It is only through tireless devotion to his herd that the rancher will ensure the health of his animals and the financial survival of his family. Drought, disease, and wild animals are always on the prowl looking for unprotected beasts to assail! The rancher must keep watch to ward off the attackers.

The principle of daily diligence applies to all of life. Faithful performance in our jobs is necessary whether it be feeding animals or entering data into a computer. Daily diligence by mom and dad means being alert to dangers facing our families. Parents who are too busy, children without supervision, and television that is not monitored are modern assaults on the health of a family. Parental diligence demands that we give careful attention to "our herds," our families. Look for the signs of health and happiness. Do the children walk through the house and sing? Do they devise simple games to occupy themselves? Do they listen to and obey the voice of mom and dad? Is "I love you" frequently heard? Does bedtime mean hugs, stories, and being tucked in? These are signs of happy and contented children. When their behavior becomes disruptive, can it be quickly stilled by mom and dad’s strong presence and voice?

To be able to have this kind of influence in a home, mom and dad must be in the home. They must be active in the family. Children left to raise themselves will . . . but not very effectively. Their lack of discipline and maturity will set the tone for the family and create disorder and chaos. Only the loving presence of mom and dad can instill order and peace.

There are a lot of demands on time and resources that work against parents dedicating the time and energy required to give diligent attention to family health. Jobs, financial demands, insecurity, and exhaustion plague all of us, robbing us of energy and confidence. Every parent struggles with these assaults, but the successful parents persevere, consistently applying care and attention to their flocks.

As our children grow older, spending time with them isn’t as simple as reading a bedtime story or kicking a soccer ball in the yard. In high school, it means traveling across the state to watch them swing a bat or fly over a hurdle. Considerable time and money are involved! Is it worth it? Does this have anything to do with giving attention to our "herd?" Listen to these words from a young friend of mine: "My dad has never been to one of my games."

A high school senior shared these words with Cheryl and me as he was showing us the trophies of his baseball career. His pitching struck fear into opponents and confidence into his team. He claimed many victories and received numerous awards. As he looked at the trophy in his hands, a note of sadness came over his face, and he softly said, "My dad has never been to one of my games."

Missing four years of his son’s games was merely symptomatic of this dad’s failure to monitor the health of his family. He simply wasn’t present. His son could not bask in the glory of his baseball success because he was silently grieving that he couldn’t share it with his dad. Dad’s inattentiveness bred hurt and bitterness into the heart of his family. His herd suffered.

Think about Proverbs 27:23–24 applied to the family: "Be sure you know the condition of your family, give careful attention to your children; for closeness does not endure, and family health is not secure for all generations." Healthy families are not only possible; they are promised by God, if we approach our role as parents with daily diligence, feeding, teaching, and nurturing our young ones. If that includes attending their sports activities, then I’ll see you at the ballpark. Or the golf course, as the case may be, as today we are following our high school daughter around 18 holes of gold in her regional tournament. (This is Kristin pictured in a recent tournament).

(This article is from Roaring Lions, Cracking Rocks and Other Gems from Proverbs)

Warren Baldwin

Remember When...

Over the past two weeks, my family has been a little bored.  My 11 year old daughter, Stephanie, had her tonsils removed and we were told to keep her quiet for two weeks.  No swimming, or running, or rough housing.  Did I mention that she was a tomboy?

Her brother, Daniel, has missed his "buddy." Yesterday, after eating lunch, the two of them went out on the back deck for some fresh air. My youngest daughter had left her bubbles outside, and before long they were having a blast! Bubbles were flying and they were using ninja moves and annihilating those tiny missiles! They were laughing and having so much fun, I decided to sit down in my kitchen chair and just watch them.

Toward the end of their bubble wars, my daughter said, "You know, I had forgotten how much fun bubbles could be!"

As we age, we are expected to mature - which is a good thing. But why does maturing mean giving up fun? It seems as if mature adults don't know how to kick back and enjoy the little things, like bubbles! Laughter is good for the soul, and for relationships.

When is the last time you and your spouse laughed together? The older I become, the harder my life seems to be. A seriousness has taken over where I used to be lighthearted. So, today, I will remember what used to make me laugh.

Date idea:

Plan to talk with your spouse about the things that used to make both of you laugh. Reminisce together about a time when you felt lighthearted and joyful. Then, try to replicate one of the events. It doesn't matter if it seems childish - let yourself go and just have FUN laughing together! Try to pick two events, one from each of your memory banks.

Live, Laugh, Love!